sibling rivalry

What Are the Most Common Family Conflicts?

Family conflicts happen when the members have varying beliefs that clash. Misunderstandings and jumping to conclusions can make matters worse, especially regarding money, the children or taking care of elder parents. While occasional conflicts are part of life, unresolved disagreements can be damaging, and can lead to long-term resentment.

Positive communication is the best way to come up with a peaceful resolution. Here are some common family issues and tips on how to deal with them:

Top 5 Reasons of Misunderstandings in the Family

Divorce conflicts

There were 7.6 new divorces for every 1,000 women according to the 2019 American Community Survey by U.S. Census Bureau. Some common arguments include financial matters, the proper discipline of the children, and other co-parenting issues. In most cases, one parent can be more rigid, while the other one is more lenient.

There are some times when co-parents are constantly arguing, it can be caused by the simplest of things like the child’s pick-up or drop-off time, vacation plans, or behavior changes. It can also be caused by one of the top reasons most co-parents argue about – child support.

Most families think that child support is a one-time process. In reality, there are always changing costs in raising your kids and additional expenses that require adjustments to your income. If your arguments with your ex worsen or become more complicated, you can always request a review of the child support order due to changes in circumstances.

woman hugging daughter

Money

Families get into all sorts of disagreements and arguments over money. From disagreements on who will pay for aging parents, to fighting over inheritance that can even result in estate and trust litigation. Usually, if a member of the family feels that they have been treated unfairly, they can hold onto resentment for years, or even a lifetime.

Money is usually associated with emotions that run deep for some people. They can feel disrespected, cheated, or that their entire life was unsuccessful because of different financial conflicts. These painful emotions aren’t forgotten that easily, which is why money conflicts can be devastating for families. To make peace, this should be rectified as quickly as possible.

Having open conversations with each other is the best way to resolve this kind of issue. For instance, talk with your parents and children about financial preparation for eldercare. Ensure that the money is specifically set aside early, so you don’t have to fight with your siblings when the time comes. You can also consult with an estate attorney to ensure these things are legally taken care of.

Lack of honesty

The consequences of frequent lying are not simple, especially in a family. Lies can create and destroy social networks, breed guilt and even influence how other people lie. The worst part is when children are often exposed to lies, they’re also likely to hide the truth as they get older.

When lies mount up in a relationship then the truth comes out, it can be more hurtful than the secret itself. The liar often feels uncomfortable or guilty during conversations with the family and tends to avoid certain topics. Remember that while lying can resolve a problem quickly, maintaining it can be stressful and often leads to long-term problems.

To reduce dishonesty in the family, try to always consider how others might feel if you constantly lie to them. Lying can also have serious effects on your health, so consider decreasing your lying to reduce stress and other harmful effects on your health.

Getting comfortable with the truth can be challenging and painful, but learning how to accept it is more peaceful and will teach you valuable lessons.

Parental favoritism

When parents display favoritism on one child over the other, it can cause sibling conflicts that can even last a lifetime. The unfavored child can experience feelings of low self-worth and decreased confidence. It can affect their performance at school, jobs and in their interpersonal relationships.

A good approach to prevent favoritism is to be aware of how to treat your children and be as fair as possible. Listen and praise each child as equally as possible and remember that your actions will affect your child and shape them on how they’re going to develop as a person.

Stepparent-stepchild conflict

Children are most affected when one of their parents remarry. It’s usually one doesn’t like the other, and this can cause further conflicts in the family. To resolve this, communication is always the key. Come up with a plan together so everybody is on the same page. This works as long as you and your partner agree on a fair method especially when it comes to disciplining the children.

Family conflicts are normal, the important thing is to always have open communication and willingness to settle any disagreements with everyone. The stability and strength of your relationship all depends on your goal of sticking together as a family no matter what.

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